Friday, January 09, 2009

More on journal - self portrait

i have been looking and looking inside myself to see what made up 'me' for this self portrait exercise.. the interesting thing I realized was that if i wasn't looking for anything in particular (with no preconception of what i was), i didn't find anything. It felt like me starring into myself starring back at me silently saying " so you've seen the real me, *silence*"
I think I was trying too hard in the last post to paint a portrait that looked like me but i felt that it wasn't what i wanted to convey. On the surface I am this and that... but i wanted to paint what i really was about deep inside, past the flesh, the face... past obligations and should's and shouldn'ts....
Tonight I sat down and told myself that i was under no pressure to create.. i was just going to paint something simple with myself in mind but without preconceptions. .
I started out by underpainting the face with cerulean mixed with titanium white.. and in dark areas, i highlighted using burnt umber.
Then i roughly started painting in the skin with the blue mixture.. blue representing the spiritual element and then i layered on some tinted smoky white colour over the blues. So you can see the blue undertones coming through underneath. Lastly, i highlighted areas with lighter skin colour.
This was so much fun and although it doesn't look much like me, it does feel a little more like me than the one below.
I will try another one tomorrow.. perhaps with clothes on LOL


wanda miller said...

First Sulea, thank you so for the wow. i really was excited when i finished the painting. i love all the subtle pics like you and misty paint, & this is so bold. i truly love what you just finished, you've got something inside that comes out in your work that is quite SPECIAL. sincerely, wanda

Deirdra Doan said...

Maybe you saw Peace....the nature of a woman is to be.....and her presence her beauty can speak that all is right all is calm...I think that is what you saw as you looked into your essence of your feminine soul? I think that much of your work has that beautiful serenity in it.

Thank you for your comment to kind.

♥ milliande said...

i love the deep emotion this painting is conveying to me ... such serenity in its own right.... and yes ...for me too it is not about representative art that looks like me ..but finding those aspects that visually are me ... thanks for your kind comments on my art videos ... it has been an interesting journey ..almost like i am witnessing myself being myself ... i enjoyed taking a peek at your art ..
♥ milliande

Jennifer White said...

Your posts today are beautiful... found you through Misty's page. It never ceases to amaze me how much pressure we can put on ourselves in just trying to create something. I'm VERY good at that, always comparing and wondering if it's really what I set off to do in the first place.

Stay motivated...I'm looking forward to seeing other posts in the next few days.

joanne said...

this is just so beautiful...and your post conveys so much wisdom in it...i love your self portrait and the heart that is so obviously pouring into it.

Dawnie said...

Seems your finding this challenge very fullfilling Sulea and thankyou for sharing your journey.AMAZING to read your words and share your progress.I agree that a 'likeness' can sometimes not capture the 'feel' .

Lisa Cohen said...

Thank you for visiting my blog... because if it wasn't for that I wouldn't have found YOURS! I really am enjoying your self-portraits - you paint such moving works of art... especially this one in that you feel it portrays *you* more than the one that resembles your physical presence. How interesting that is!!