Work in Progress - oil painting

Hello,

i'm back to teaching myself how to paint ... it feels like i'm fumbling in the darkness trying to work out how to make things look the way i wish they would look. It is all very frustrating.

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This painting actually started 6 months ago. It was a bluer picture then with little brown or yellows. Then i decided to make it a brown yellow painting. May add some more cows later, i'm not sure yet. It's alright........ by far not where I would like it to be. Oil painting seems harder than acrylic. Maybe i'll try painting the same scene in acrylic and see what happens.

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I had a disaster with apples few weeks ago and abandoned it. i dunno. i lose interest so easily but have this desire to work through the difficult issues. I will paint a million gum trees if i have to and grass.. why is grass so difficult to do.

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Anyway.. this painting isn't finished yet. I thought i would post something...

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PS at least the cows look cute.... hehe

Blogging break :)

Just a little note to say I won't be blogging for the next few days but will pick up the Misty January journalling again on monday.

Yellow and pink

Yellow was better than i thought but i have never used it on it's own. It was always a colour i used to enhanced another.

But it wasn't as bad as pink.. I am not a pink person. There is a story behind it.

When i was a little girl, my mum decided to paint my room pink, and along with that were pink pillows and bedspread. It wasn't a nice light pink.. it was a brighter than bright hot pink and when night came, we had this orange night light at the stairway next to my bedroom... and it shone into my bedroom... and the hot pink became red like a furnace. The stairway light would cast long shadows from objects in the bedroom, towering across the ceiling and i would be shaking in the bed terrified. I must have thought it was hell. I cannot quite remember what happened after because many many years later when i visited that room again, it was no longer pink. So while others think of nice pink bunnies and flowers, pink reminds me of monsters...

The pink house below is a reminder of that pink room. I think it will be my first and last pink item. Initially i drew a pink monster... then thought i didn't think anyone would understand LOL so i painted over him and presented this tamer version of the pink monster.

Red

This painting started out with a painting of a man with a tree on his head all in dark red LOL and slowly it changed into this.. not too sure if i like it but i like the background... :o)

White

So this is white... she is letting out the butterflies in her tummy hehe :o)

Green

Here is my entry for the colour green... :oD

Orange

This is my entry for the orange theme.. i almost chickened out of the colour orange... couldn't think of anything except oranges and i had to stop the urge to paint some!!!!

Green the next colour is going to be a challenge... hmm

BLUE

I can't believe how much art i have done for the month of january! and i am currently work full time!!! It has been fun so far For this week on Misty's blog, we are doing monochromatic coloured journal pages.. one colour for each day this week!!!!!!!!!!!! i don't know if i can do it... but i'll start and see how i go.

The first colour is......... BLUE.. i did this tonight. hmm next entry is orange... what can i do for orange.. hmmmm i need some sleep now... nite!!! :)

Self portrait - 'Painted'

'Painted'

acrylic on canvas

i was so excited painting this portrait.. it was unfolding as the painting begun and i can't hide how happy i am that it turned out the way it did.. this painting technique was sooooo cool. In a way it's impressionistic in that there are lots of layers of strokes and graduation in colour and texture. You can click the picture to get a closer view of the textures. i love how it's not perfect and i love big buttons!!! i can't wait to try another painting like this.

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but what should i paint next? i usually get my ideas when i'm stuck at my desk at work or in the shower... i'm one of those people who cannot do anything when forced.. a lot of the times i just sit and wait.. sometimes i wait for weeks on end for a particular idea to ripen and when it's ripe for the picking, then i can paint.. If i try to paint before, the painting feels like it lacks what it could be.. it's like waiting for time and movement to converge, or be in sync. The most frustrating times are when i plan to do something and my heart wants to do something else.. it is just a disaster.

The Big Red Chair
acrylic on canvas

Few hours later.....

I managed to fit in another painting for this weekend.. this was a painting i had wanted to do for a long time but never found the time or energy for... I am loving being part of Misty's journal challenge/ sharing. It has been fun discovering new blogs and feeling connected ..

More portraits

I have been reflecting...

Deafened by the voice of desire
you are unaware the Beloved lives
in the core of your heart.
Stop the noise and
you wil hear His voice
in the silence.
~ Rumi

This new portrait is about the relationship between the the inner self and the form, between the 'Nameless and the Name'. Where the form is seen as the door into the love that has no boundaries.
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It is about trying to communicate what it's like learning to live inside out, to understand infinity in form. Surrendering by acceptance, going inward and letting go, and learning about why nothingness is not empty.

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More on journal - self portrait

i have been looking and looking inside myself to see what made up 'me' for this self portrait exercise.. the interesting thing I realized was that if i wasn't looking for anything in particular (with no preconception of what i was), i didn't find anything. It felt like me starring into myself starring back at me silently saying " so you've seen the real me, *silence*"
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I think I was trying too hard in the last post to paint a portrait that looked like me but i felt that it wasn't what i wanted to convey. On the surface I am this and that... but i wanted to paint what i really was about deep inside, past the flesh, the face... past obligations and should's and shouldn'ts....
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Tonight I sat down and told myself that i was under no pressure to create.. i was just going to paint something simple with myself in mind but without preconceptions. .
I started out by underpainting the face with cerulean mixed with titanium white.. and in dark areas, i highlighted using burnt umber.
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Then i roughly started painting in the skin with the blue mixture.. blue representing the spiritual element and then i layered on some tinted smoky white colour over the blues. So you can see the blue undertones coming through underneath. Lastly, i highlighted areas with lighter skin colour.
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This was so much fun and although it doesn't look much like me, it does feel a little more like me than the one below.
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I will try another one tomorrow.. perhaps with clothes on LOL
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:o)

Journal challenge - self portrait

This is a little unnerving to post.

Okay I was supposed to do a self portrait for the journal challenge and it wasn't an easy task but at least i tried it... it was a surreal experience.